Inside Asorock: The Prepared Ebola Speech

 

The discussion is as follows… the events maybe real but the stories surrounding the events are the ones that shouldn’t be trusted!

 

Dame-Patience Jonathan

Dear, it’s been a while I spoke in the public scene, and you haven’t mentioned anything about it… don’t you think the people will love to hear one or two things from the number one mother in Nigeria so they don’t think I am less concerned about the state of the nation especially with the Epidamik Ebola in town. I should have spoken last week but for the nurse that fled quarantine. She just spoilt my already prepared speech meant to praise the women in the medical profession.

 

Buchi (Minister for health)

Er… madam ma, I think I am taking proper care of the whole situation. For now, I don’t think your opinion of the whole thing is needed. You see, the patients are psychologically demoralised having been isolated for weeks now and they won’t be able to stand any humiliation from Nigerians trying to make silly jokes of your whole speech again; since they are directly involved. The jokes might just kill them faster than the Ebola. In fact, did you hear that the first Ebola patient was just discharged from the hospital? He responded to treatment and he’s doing fine now.

                                                             Dame-Patience Jonathan

Meishornu!!! Buchi, I said keep quiet. Are you trying to insult a whole first lady of the federation of Nigeria? If you have something against my speech, why don’t you come out and tell it to my face. I know sey no be only you waka come… I have been suspecting the whole cabinet; you have been making jokes of my speech ba? See, I will sack you all. Rubbish.

Honey, you will not say anything? See how your minster is standing there saying all sort to your wife… Honey! Honey! Honey!

                                                              Goodluck Jonathan

Dame, as you are seeing me so, I don’t have appetite for all this. And besides Buchi is partially right. I don’t support your idea of giving speech. America will think we are just joking here. I am more concerned 2015 than Ebola. I knew those Osun people don’t like PDP. I can remember I lost in that state when I contested for the general elections. But I thought Omisore was capable… I was told he won elections from the prison for Christ sake. How could he have lost? Osun has large number of registered voters and now my yet to be declared 2015 ambition is already at stake. After all the money and campaign we put into it, we lost! Patience, we lost and you are concerned about speech?

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                                                           Dame-Patience Jonathan

You have want to be politicizing me? After everything we have been through together. Haaa!

Chei! Diariz God o… I am going to join the Chibok parents tomorrow… you’re discriminating against women… I will tell the whole world… this is not fair. America will know the kind of husband that you are! As for you, Buchi… I want Nigerians to know I care for the welfare of the Ebola patient. You must give me space to share my passion for the Nigerians in diaspora that are in Lagos. I have prepared my speech. You must give me space. I want to talk.

 

 

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